It was a lonely Wednesday at 2:45am, BSB was on another leg of their never ending tour, and Nick couldn't sleep. So naturally, he decided to check out LD for some crazy fan entertainment. Unfortunately for Nick ... LD was nowhere to be found...
Nick: Damn! What you mean there's no more LD? How else am I supposed to find out what all the latest rumors about us are?? Oh wait ... it's redirecting me to some place called "AfterLD" *clicks* ... Well this sucks! This place is deader than Howie's Fan Conventions!! Where did everyone GO??
Several minutes of investigating later
Nick: Ooooh! This looks promising ... The Darkside *clicks* ... Oh wow ... JACKPOT!! ... I've gotta tell the other guys about this!
Brian: What you looking at Nicky?
Nick: *minimises* DON'T sneak up on me like that!
Brian: You looking at porn?
Nick: No
Brian: AJ!!!! HOWIE!!! Come here, Nick's looking at porn!
*AJ comes running* *Howie wanders over*
AJ: PORN? *cheesy grin*
Nick: It’s NOT porn, look *maximises* Its "The Darkside" it’s the new LD!
Howie: Oh no, no no no. WHY are you reading that? LD was... well...
AJ: Full of psychos?
Nick: Yeah but this place seems ok, look there’s even a thread about you Howie "The Pest twittered.... world survived"
*Boys roar with laughter, except Howie*
Howie: PEST? PEST? Why are they making me sound like a cockroach? Oh look they have a thread about MY album!!!! *beams with pride*
Brian: Aww that’s so sweet, they are obviously really nice people to bother with a thread for that *grins*
Howie: *glares at Brian*
Nick: HA! Look at me go! MY album thread is already on #5! Go me!! *does cabbagepatch dance*
Brian: *smacks Nick in the back of the head* Keep scrolling. See what we can find on here.
Nick: *scrolls and clicks through pages* OOOOH look at THIS thread! "If all men would look like
Nick Carter" *clicks*
Howie: Obviously yet ANOTHER message board swarming with Nick fans *rolls eyes* It's amazing he can get his head thru the damn door...
AJ: *singsongs* Sooooooomeone is jeaaaaaaloussssssssss.
Howie: *takes a swing at AJ, completely misses and smacks Nick*
Nick: OUCH!! Dammit!!
Howie: At least it wasn't a complete miss. Just get outta there and keep looking.
AJ: Wait! Scroll back up. Backstreet Noise Project. WHY does that sound so familiar?
*clicks on thread*
Nick: Oh THESE chicks, I remember them
Howie: You do?
Nick: Yeah? Don’t you remember they were at one of our shows and some of them were on the cruise, see? *points to BNP logo*
Brian: Oh yeah I remember now
Nick: They seemed pretty harmless
AJ: I remember her, I remember her, I don't think we met her...
Brian: How do you possibly remember them? You don't even know what they look like
*boys read*
Nick: TeeHee Family Guy...
Brian: Loud moaning?
AJ: What's a BOB?
Howie: You think it stands for something?
Brian: The Beatles? This is a weird thread
AJ: Dildos?! WTF?!
Nick: Why am I in handcuffs? And why do they have me cleaning their office naked?
Howie: Why am I locked in a bathroom?
AJ: What the hell is a Tumby?
Brian: Who IS "Faceonshirt"?
*Howie, Nick and AJ look at him*
Brian: What?
AJ: Nothing
Nick: PFFFFT!!...synchronized swimmers
*Howie and AJ snicker*
Brian: What? What’s an anniversary party without synchronized swimmers?
Nick: Moving on...
Brian: Wow! There's thread's for everybody ... Nick, Howie, Nick, Me, Nick, AJ, Nick, Nick ... Hey even Kevin!!
AJ: Click on myyyyy thread
Nick: Ok ... *clicks*
Howie: Oh my GOD ... WHAT THE??
Brian: AAAAAHHH!! MY EYES!! MY VIRGIN EYES!!! *covers eyes*
Nick: Dude, what is WRONG with your fans?
AJ: Hehehehehehe! I love these RASO girls ... and HEY Look who's talking Carter! Your thread is basically crazies anonymous!
Nick: No, it's not!! I'll be the first to admit that for some reason, I do tend to attract A LOT of crazies ... but most of these girls seem normal ... sort of.
Howie: Ya, except for their vision problems...
Nick: Their WHAT???
Howie: Nothing, nothing ... let's see what else they have on this "Darkside"
Brian: Damn, this site has EVERYTHING, all the latest news, appearances, media, photos ... how do they FIND all this stuff?
AJ: I know, its trippy how they seem to know EVERYTHING ... like ... I didn't even know we were doing that!
Howie: I told you last week!! Don't you check your e-mail??
AJ: Which e-mail??
Howie: I dunno ... whichever one you gave me!
AJ: Oh ya ... THAT one ... I ALWAYS check that one ... *whistles*
Nick: Hang on ... what is THIS??
Brian: I still want to know who they mean by '“Faceonshirt”'
AJ: Are you kidding me?
Brian: What? You know I don't know what to feel about what these people say about us...so dirty
AJ: I like dirty
Nick: Me too
Brian: Well not me...
Howie, AJ and Nick: 'you're happily married'
Nick: We know, we know
AJ: You should have it trademarked already
Brian: Click on the unpopular opinion thread Nick
*clicks*
*they all read*
*silence*
Nick: Oh
Howie: Well...
AJ: Hmmm
Brian: What? I agree with a lot of that to be honest
Nick: Oh god here we go
Brian: Well this is true I mean....
AJ: Step awaaaaaaaay from the soap box, seriously Brian don’t start
Brian: But.... but....
Nick: Brian it will just make you mad, like twitter
Brian: Well we can’t all be on there chirping about the Bucs. Some of us tweet to make a stand!
AJ: Ok..... Why don’t we visit the fanfic thread?
ALL: NO
AJ: Awww
Howie: Just because you have your own personal porn stories starring you AJ doesn’t mean we all want to read it
Nick: At least he has some... *pokes Howie*
Howie: That’s low Nick... looooow.
Brian: I could do without reading about how I’m cheating on my wife.... again
AJ: What you prefer reading about your sexual experiments with Nick from before you were with "faceonshirt"? *chuckles*
Brian: That’s NOT funny! And stop calling wife that or I will have to block you on twitter with all the other nutters!
AJ: *holds hands up* Ok...yesh, touchy much.
Nick: This one looks interesting..."Things BSB will never say" *clicks*
All: *busts out laughing*
Nick: These chicks are crazy funny!! This shit is hysterical!!
AJ: Fo sho! I would NEVER give up my porn!!!!!!
Brian: *touches top of head* The monk comment kinda stings.
AJ: HA! Welcome to my world dude!
Howie: *primps hair in mirror* Well, at least Nick and I don't have that problem.
Brian and AJ: Shut it Howard!
*Brian, AJ and Howie all start sniffing the air and start waving their hands in front of their faces*
AJ: Jesus Nick!! What the FUCK did you eat for dinner dude?! That shit is RANK!!
Nick: Sorry...its better not to keep that stuff bottled up
*Howie walks over and opens a window and turns on fan*
Howie: Nick, you need an assplug buddy...that crap is nasty
Nick: Sorry? *shrugs*
Brian: Can we just get back to checkin this site out, please? And Nick, warning next time!!!
Nick: Hey, there's different areas to this board. *clicks the Graphics topic* WOW! Look at some of
this stuff! These girls have some crazy talent! I might have to hire this Maneth girl to do some graphic work for me.
Brian: I didn't know you could take videos and make those pictures...COOL!
AJ: WOW! Look at those of my Monkee! So beautiful!
Howie: I don't see any of me.
Nick: Shocker there huh?
All: *laughs hysterically*
AJ: Dude....*shakes head* Never mind...
*keeps reading through threads*
AJ: LOOK! They have a Kevin's Bitches thread!
Nick: I'm afraid to click on it, it must be one of those "oh migaaaawd Kevin come back!!" threads
Brian: Kevin Bitches *snorts* he sure looks like a pimp with that ugly-ass ring he wears on his pinky...
Howie: I'm surprised they still talk about Kevin...
Nick: I'm surprised they have a thread for your album *laughs*
AJ: *rolls eyes* Shut the fuck up you two!
AJ: I gotta tell Kevin that he still got it going on...uh...no pun intended. *grabs cell phone*
LA, 6PM - Kevin's backyard:
*Kevin picks up cell phone, looks at caller ID and sighs heavily*
KEVIN: AJ, I AM NOT COMING BACK! LEAVE ME ALOOOONE!!
AJ: Yo dude, chill! I Don't want you to come back!
Kevin: Oh...really?
AJ: Yeah, rehab taught me, for the third time, that I have to let go of things if I wanna be happy. Dude, listen up, I need you to go back into the house and log in on your computer!
Kevin: What's makes you think I'm not inside my house?
AJ: You're done shooting that soft porn movie of yours, aren't you?
Kevin: It's NOT PORN, it's a movie about the hypocrisy of society back in the 60's and...
AJ: .And cooking casseroles and fucking your neighbor's wife, got it! Now leave the grass alone and get your lap-top!
*Kevin goes inside the house and logs into website given by AJ*
Kevin: Now what?? If you guys wanted me to know that Howie has an album, Nick has an album, you went to rehab, there's a noisy project about Backstreet you could have just tell me instead of making me...wait..."The Kevin Bitches thread'?? What the hell?
AJ: YES! THIS! DUDE you still gots DA BITCHES *jumps up and down* How awesome is that?
Brian: *looks at AJ and says a silent prayer*
Kevin: Wow, this is...I mean...yeah baby, this old man still got it huh? *smirks and looks proudly at ugly-ass ring on pinky*
AJ: You still there?
Kevin: Uh...yes... *licks lips loudly and caresses chest while reading the thread*
AJ: Dude, don't tell me...dude, EW what the hell are you doing? Did you just lick your lips??
Kevin: What?? I...NO!!
AJ: *hangs up on Kevin* EWWWW!! EWWWW!!! Fucking EW!!
Howie: So, did he enjoy his thread?
AJ: A little too much, yes! *drops cell phone and shudders*
Nick: *clicks, types, erase, types again* Shit, I can't type!
Brian: What you doing??
Nick: I'm joining TDS! What you think I'm doing??
Brian: Oh Dear Lord, bless his soul....
Nick: All I need is a screen name… *thinks hard*
Nick: GOT IT! *types* “ IHaveAHighCrack”
*Brian falls off of chair laughing*
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