10.21.2010

Dear BSB: This Is Us Being Confused



This is Beth, BN's "Fearless Leader" wishing you a Happy BN Day!

Today is the official one year anniversary of BN's founding! Wow, a year. We've done so much with that year too: we ran Lady V's Corner and learned about her mixing skills, we got BSB hug tips from Jen and tried to see who could make her laugh until she snorted , B advised us on what NOT to say and earned her nickname "The Brazilian Tornado", we got Poppy and her crazy Photoshop skills safely home, we met Chels "Hat" and Luz "Sorting" in Ohio for the Noisy Convention, we saw what happens when you leave Di alone with a Brian BSBuddy...oh yeah, we did some writing too. ;)
It's been a blessing to have such wonderful friends around the world--the girls will be modest about it, but they sent me flowers to celebrate today! This project has been a great experience, and we're looking forward to another year of amusing/annoying you with our antics.
'Cuz as long as there's Backstreet...we'll be coming back again.

Or, in V's words: united we stand, divided we're a bit rubbish.

In honor of BN Day, we're reposting the Dear BSB that kicked off the project and brought us together. We hope it makes you laugh as much as the first time, and look forward to seeing you in the TDS chatroom tonight for the live party at 8pm EST!

Unedited and uncut, Dear BSB: We Have Some Questions about This Is Us

Dear BSB,

We fans love you and we love love LOVE the new album, but we on the LD forum have some questions that need answering….

“Straight Through My Heart”:
Having taken a gun safety class myself, I have to say: if she’s got you “straight through” your heart…dude, she’s been practicing on someone else, because that is a DANG hard shot. Especially with a single bullet.
So I’d be in disbelief too.
Also, everything’s a little harder to escape once you get shot through the heart. So yes you would have trouble resisting. Or escaping. Or breathing.
We’d also like to have words with you on the STMH video, since it’s werewolves that you shoot, not vampires. K? Although, I guess being staked through the heart at a crossroad at midnight doesn’t quite have the same ring to it….

“She’s a Dream”:
Guys, there is a whole THREAD about this, which is why it’s out of order. We need this addressed quickly.
As fans, we’re all about girls loving you for you, but um….
A girl who “ain’t got cable/ she ain’t even got a radio”…are you really looking for a girl who lives under a rock?
Or is she just so dumb she can’t figure out from all that “VIP” hanging that you’re famous?
And if she doesn’t know you’re “on the stage three or four times a week”, she’s just clueless, and you don’t call her often, now do you?
Maybe all the “ooooh” and “ahhh” went to her head.
I'm sure over-pronouncing vowels does that to some people.

“Bigger”:
Brian’s “no one to count on at all”? He sure tweets the most often!
AJ has to be the liar, the egotist…because…we think Howie would only lie about taking out the trash?
You guys really don’t come off well in this song. Is this what happens after you make “The Call”?
“All the messed up things I do/ I swear I’ll make them up to you”—wait, aren’t you the same guys that did “More Than That” and “Get Another Boyfriend”? You’re supposed to be stealing us from bad boyfriends, not becoming them!
Even Shawty would dump you if you acted this way.

“Bye Bye Love”:
Of course you want to stay single: you’re famous, hot, wealthy…whoa, wait. Aren’t two of you married?
Do your WIVES know about this track?!
Besides, if you’re an egotistical liar who wants to date clueless women…can you be that picky about “a girl that only want to come back/ ‘cause another man broke her heart”?

“All of Your Life (You Need Love)”:
Nick wants to “hold you/ I’ll save you”.
One question: Where do we sign up?

“If I Knew Then”:
How often are we going to discuss the handbook/manual/instructions of love? We got it in the first verse! Also, love as a GPS? Not sure that’s sexy. My Garmin’s kinda evil, and I cuss at it a lot.

“This Is Us”:
Uh, we would believe in you, but we’re still a little freaked out by your “Bigger” confessions. And that you want to stay single.
And you bleed.
A lot.
Also, how are we supposed to “let the world know/ this is us”, if ideally we have no radio or cable? Send a telegram?

“PDA”:
Were we a little hormonal this day, Boys?
Also, as a dental assistant, any guy talking about rotting teeth: total turn off. Sorry Howie.
Nick: I don't know about everyone else, but every time you say "booooooty"....
I burst out laughing a la the BSB on Ice video. Boy, you should only say "booty" when it's in reference to shaking your own. Which, btw, we would like more of.
But hey, we all think about making out…at the grocery store? You could get accidentally sprayed with chemicals in Produce, or get frozen to a freezer door, or slip when they’re mopping the floor. Not safe. Did AJ write this after his K-Mart escapade?
So really, if you get tackled in a grocery store now, it’s your own fault: you asked for it.
Oh, and it's probably someone from LD.

“Masquerade”:
Unless you’re speaking in metaphor (or bringing Shawty), we’re fans.
And we’ve got cable.
We recognize the back of your head at fifty feet.
Nice try though!

“Shattered”:
Um, you guys are a little violent on this album. You’re bleeding on the floor, you’re shot straight through the heart, words are burning, you’re being dragged to the grave, and you’re shattered with holes in your heart, “cut from within side.”
Does Jive give you good health insurance? Because it sounds like your ER bills are through the roof!
Two words: body. armor.
Look into it.
Or, can we kiss it and make it better?

“Undone”:
You don’t want to see her no more, you don’t want to feel her no more?
But you stuck around to sing?
That’s kinda passive aggressive. But pretty, very pretty.
Tell me more. ‘Cause I’ll never break your heart—um, I will love you more than—uh….
Oh forget it:
Backstreet’s Back, alright!

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