Nick's Noisy Birthday: Round 2

Happy Birthday Nick!! We Noisy Girls are just SO excited about all your new songs. Not that we listened to any of them that have been leaked or anything ... no no ... we would never do that! We just ummm ... GUESSED that uhh ... the whole ... "I'm Taking Off" thing had to do with space ... we saw some stuff on Twitter and uhhh ... well, we're just naturally brilliant like that.
Anyhoodles, we hope that you and all our noisy follwers enjoy this piece inspired by your new album!! :)

The boys were hard at work in the studio, but it was Nick's birthday and so Brian, AJ, and Howie had a few surprises up their sleeve for Nick. They were all ready to get the party started but they couldn't find Nick anywhere. Then they heard some strange noises coming from the back room ...

Nick: VROOOM VROOOM!! Time for warp speed team!!!

Brian: *Hears noise* Hey fellas... what's that noise?

Howie:*checks hair for the millionth time* Dammit! #72 won't stay in place! *looks up* What?

AJ: Rainbows, puppies and kittens lollipops, clowns and cake … mmm … cake

Nick: Oh no!! Aliens!!! PEW!! PEW!!!

Brian: *Walks around corner* Oh my goodness! Nicks got a rocket!!!!!!

AJ: I wonder if they made Nick's birthday cake yet

Howie: Look... I think Nick is reliving the Larger than Life video...

Nick: Hey guys!! Come join me in my rocket!!

Brian: Cool! *runs over* Nick!!! Nick!!! Can I play!!!?

AJ: I could actually use a smoke right now...NO! Bad Alex, more happy thoughts

Nick: Sure Rok ... you can be Spock!! Hehehehehe! That rhymes.

AJ: Ballerinas

Howie: *looks at Nick like he's lost his peapickin mind*

Brian: But Spock's strange... can’t I be Kirk?

Nick: No, I'm Kirk!!

Brian: But.... Niiiiiiick! *frowns*

AJ: Can I play? I wanna be Hans!

Nick: Hans?? That's Star Wars AJ!! I’m playing Star TREK

AJ: Oh...well then screw this!

Brian: Hahaha *points at AJ* You can’t play now! *jumps in beside Nick*

Nick: It's my birthday Brian!! Come on ... be Spock!!!

Howie: I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.

AJ: must.resist.smoking.urge

Brian: Live long and prosper dude! This is awesome!

Nick: Alright ... so we just entered warp speed and I'm trying to defeat the aliens

Brian: *shouts* Raise shields!!!

AJ: Where's that cake?

Nick: Cake? There’s no time for cake!! We have an alien army attacking this ship!!

Howie: *comes back in carrying Nick's rocket-shaped cake*

AJ: CAKE!!!!

Nick: D ... please tell me you didn't have that in the bathroom with you?

Howie: *winks*

AJ: That's just nasty

Howie: Where else was I gonna hide it!?!

Nick: DUDE!! ... Do you KNOW what I do in there??

AJ: Okay that's it I’m having a smoke

Brian: AJ just ask yourself... what would Jesus do?

AJ: He would want me to be happy *puffs*

Brian: *gets up and inspects cake* Howie is that chocolate cake?

Howie: Ok fine... don't eat the chocolate cake with ice cream filling. Don't bother me none.

Nick: Ice cream??? ... hmmm

Brian: AJ can’t play rocket ship or have the cake... best light up that smoke dude LOL

AJ: Ice cream??? Shut it choir boy, GIMME THAT CAKE!!

Nick: *grabs a fork and shoves 10 bites down throat*

Howie: Careful! You'll give yourself a brain freeze!

Brian: Woah! Woah!!! We were supposed to say grace NICK! *glares*

AJ: GRACE! Happy now?

Nick: *talks with mouth full* Sorry!

Brian: *shakes head*

Howie: EWWWWW! Cake spit!! *wipes face and busts out Purell*

Nick: hehehehehehe! *licks Howie*

Howie: EW EW EWWWW!! *dumps Purell over head*

Brian: *jumps back in rocket* Hey Nick... I’m.... *snorts* I'm.... taking off!!!!! *looks astonished* I am so damn funny!

Nick: *shoves down 5 more bites of cake* Wait for me!! I'm the captain!!

AJ: I know! Every time I have an urge to smoke, I shall pull Howie's ear

Howie: Wait..what the hell do I look like? A security blanket?

AJ: *tugs*

Brian: *starts bouncing* Beam me up Nick!!!! Beam me up!!!

Nick: Kirk!! You gotta call me Kirk!! We're playing Star Trek!!

Brian: Ok ok... Spok to Kirk... one to beam up!

Howie: But ...wasn't the line "beam me up Scotty"?

AJ: *pulls Howie's ear*

Nick: Scotty?? There's no Scotty in Star Trek!! Howie!! You gotta play right!!

Brian: *glares at Howie*

Howie: *sigh* I. give. up. *goes back to the bathroom*

AJ: Star Trek is lame, no Darth Vader, I mean come on!

Nick: Alright ... Spock ... prep the lazers!!

Brian: *picks up a stick and points it at AJ* It’s set to stun!

AJ: And I wanted to be Hans! *pouts*

Howie: *comes back out* I wanna play! Can I be Jabba The Hut?

Nick: Jabba the?? ... STAR TREK!!! ... NOT WARS!! ...UGH! … AJ ... you can be the chick ... I can't remember her name but ... there was definitely a chick in Star Trek

AJ: Do I get boobs?

Howie: Like I know these movies apart! I'll be whoever you want Nick.

Nick: Alright ... Howie can be the dude with the cool glasses that go all around his head

AJ: Levar Burton?

Howie: Glasses? Shouldn't AJ be that dude?

Nick: NO! ... AJ is the girl ... the one with the weird name ... Uhora or something

AJ: Did you just call me a whore?!

Brian: Oh boy

AJ: I am not a whore, you're the biggest whore of them all!

Howie: Ok.! AJ! Don't make me go all Kevin on your asses!!!!

Nick: Or wait ... Howie do you wanna be the guy with the ridges on his head?

Brian: The green one? Howie should be the green robot man!

Howie: Ugh … fine! But this guy better have superpowers or something cool like that!

Nick: Spock!! Make them stop questioning the captain!!

Brian: *mind melds with Howie* You are a green android called Data. You are very clever but have no emotion

Nick: Ya ... that's perfect for Howie!

Howie: Data? OOOO I like that name! I'm full of all kinds of data...like with my condo sales and all!

AJ: Ya, he's pretty much just boring all around

Nick: Alright now ... the alien army is coming ... we need to prepare ourselves!

Howie: *tucks head between knees*

Brian: Arm fazers!

AJ: I'm going to the bathroom

Howie: AJ!!! I wouldn’t if I were you!!! Too many beans on those tacos last night … I knew better than that too..

Nick: No time for bathroom breaks now Uhora ... we're about to go into warp speed!! *pushes a bunch of buttons*

AJ: Stop calling me a whore you little bitch!

Nick: DAMNIT!! I'm the CAPTAIN ... you can't call me a bitch!!

AJ: William Shatner

Brian: Aliens! Starboard side captain!


Howie: There's torpedoes in space?

Brian: Firing torpedoes!

Nick: Sure there are!! Why not?

AJ: *hides*

Howie: I just thought those were only in water… of all people YOU should know that Nicky.

Brian: Howieeeeeeee you're spoiling our game!

Nick: Exactly!! Just go with it. Now you're supposed to be a little green robot!!

Howie: Ugh! Fine. I'll just sit here and look pretty.

Nick: Pretty?? Pfffffffftttt! *snickers*

Brian: You find green robots attractive?

Nick: Ok, give me the specs Data!!

Howie: Specks of what? I don't have dandruff!!!

Nick: The specs!! Of the ship!! What's the condition?? They're firing!!

AJ: If I were you I'd be more concerned about that bald spot where hairs 50 through 61 used to be

Howie: I use conditioner! I can run home if you need it!

Nick: *shakes head*

Brian: Androids don’t use conditioner!

Howie: Well then, I bet they have a lot of dead ends.

AJ: I have the force

Nick: Oh no!! We're entering a meteor field!!

Brian: *whines* Nick can't we play this by ourselves; Howie’s spoiling it and AJ thinks he’s Darth Vader!

AJ: Hey I should get a tattoo of the death star when all my hair's gone

Nick: You're right Bri! AJ, Howie ... you are banned from the ship!! Please dismount immediately!!

AJ: Yeah you two would know about dismounting.

Howie: Dismount? EWW!!!

Nick: You know what I mean!!! Get off!!

Brian: *points stick at AJ and Howie* Its set to kill now, get off!

AJ: Now you're telling us to get off?? Ya, that doesn't sound any better.

Howie: Get off? You two are disturbing.

Brian: Don’t make me get the big ugly alien security dude with the temper!

Howie: AJ, I think those two need a little "time" together. Let's go have some cake.

AJ: Fine. I'm going to have a smoke and nothing nobody says is going to stop me! *leaves singing Prince's Get Off"

Nick: Ugh! Finally!

Brian: Yay! *embraces Nick* Ok ... lets go kill some aliens!

Nick: Yes! Now Spock, you'll have to help me navigate through the meteor field. I'll stear, you blast the meteors!

Brian: Ok! *points stick* This is fun! *begins singing Rocket man by Elton John*

Howie: Psssst..AJ! Let's throw rocks at the box "rocket" and yell METEOR SHOWER!!!!!

Nick: I can hear the aliens Spock! They must be in the middle of the field!!

Brian: Yes captain, I sense their presence *gets hit by a rock* Ooooooooooowwwwwwwww my nose!!!

Nick: Aaaaaah!! What the HELL was that??

Howie: *throws another rock*


AJ: *in Darth Vader voice* Luke, I am your FATHER

Brian: What!? Im hearing voices!!! God is that you!?

Howie: Nick, will you STOP mounting things! That’s disgusting!

Nick: *jumps out of the box and starts "shooting" * PEW!! PEW!! PEW!!!

Brian: *jumps out and fights like a ninja* I need no gun captain! *kicks AJ in the head accidentally*

AJ: AAAH! *takes off pants and waves ‘light saber’ around in the air*

Howie: AJ! Wrong light saber dude. Put that thing away!!

AJ: I like overcompensating. Mine glows too!

Nick: *holds "gun" up to Howie's head* Don't move or I'll shoot!!

Howie: *stops, looks at Nick, throws another rock at the box*

AJ: *whacks Brian* Yeah, feel the force!

Brian: Hi yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! *ninja chops* Whoa! Hang on ... don’t hit me with THAT! That’s unholy!

Nick: EW!! AJ!! Put your pants back on!!!

AJ: NEVER!!!!!!!!! Yeah check this out, I know you're jealous!

Brian: Howieeeeeeeeeeeee! AJ's got his weener out!!!! *cries*

AJ: *runs and then falls and trips*

Brian: This is not supposed to be the Star Trek version of porn!

Nick: Howie!! I command you to make AJ put his pants back on!!! *covers eyes*

AJ: Its Star Whores!

Howie: *sighs* AJ, we talked about this. The pants must stay on. No one wants to see the zebra stripped skivvies or...THAT. Come on buddy. Do it and you can have a ciggerette.

AJ: Okay *eyes piñata*

Nick: Can I uncover my eyes now??

AJ: Yes

Howie: Yes, its safe. And NO AJ, you can NOT use your "light saber" for the piñata.

AJ: Damn! *walks away humming Star Wars theme*

Nick: There's a piñata??

Brian: Oooh piñata?!?

Nick: *holds "gun" back up to Howie's head* Take me to your piñata!

Howie: *points the the rocket shaped piñata in the tree* Have at it boys!

Nick: Ooooh!! *runs over and put on blindfold* Alright ... someone call ground control ... cuz I'm taking off! *picks up stick* 5 … 4 … 3 …

Howie: Ok .. maybe this wasn't such a great idea. Nick, blindfolded, with a bat

Nick: 2 … 1 … WHACK!!!

AJ: Oh god! *runs inside*

Brian: *runs over and starts whacking*

Howie: OUCH!!!! That hurts!! Stop!!!!

Nick: Ohhh!! Sorry Howie!!

AJ: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Nick: Point me in the direction of the piñata!!

Howie: Brian,YOU do it. I think he broke my arm!

Brian: *sings* I want candy! *shakes ass*

Nick: *starts swinging around randomly*

Howie: *dives into bushes*

Nick: Am I close??

Brian: *points* Come on Nick higher!

AJ: That was also sexual

Howie: Brian! WHY are you pointing!?! He's BLINDFOLDED!!!!!!

Brian: Don’t make me go get Leighanne for bible studies AJ!

Nick: Higher?? ... *swings stick above head*

AJ: How many blondes does it take to break open a pinata?

Brian: *lifts Nick onto shoulders* Jesus dude... you put on a few pounds?

Nick: It's all that cake! Alright now ... CHARGE!!

Howie: This is so not gonna end well...

Nick: *swings stick around*

Brian: *strains* hhhhhiiiiighhherr


Brian: *wobbles* To the left Nicky!!

Howie: *video tapes for later blackmail material*

Nick: Am I hitting it yet??

AJ: What is with you people and the sexual references?

Brian: What’s that smell? Have you just farted on me?

Nick: OOOPS! ... Sorry B-Rok!! *snickers*

Howie: Sorry Brian! It's all those beans last night!

Brian: Oooooh no ... thats sick dude *wobbles*

AJ: Ahahahahahahahahaha! Right by your mouth too dude!

Brian: Get down!

AJ: And move it all around

Nick: No! I’ve almost … aaaaahhh!! ... stop wobbling dawg! ... I'm gonna ... aaaaah ... aaaahh ... AAAAAHHHHHH!!! *falls*

Brian: *falls to the ground* THUD!

Howie: *facepalms*

AJ: I think you just killed Brian

Nick: *takes off blindfold* ... Did we at least get the candy??

Brian: I think I broke my leg ya'll

Howie: *walks over, takes pinata down, cracks it open and throws candy*

Nick: YAY!!! Candy! *runs around picking it all up and shoving it in pockets*

Howie: Now that I have a broken arm and Brian has a broken leg, I think this party should wrap up before we all end up in body casts or bags.

Nick: But, but ... I'm not tiiiiired yet!!! *pouts, then eats candy*

Brian: Can someone call me an ambulance? There’s bone sticking out. Oh my gosh, Leighanne is gonna kill me

Howie: Nick damn near beat her to it!

Nick: Here Bri ... have some candy!

Brian: Oooh candy! *sticks some up nostrils and pulls a face* hehehehhehe!

Nick: *runs around shooting imaginary aliens*

AJ: *lights up another cigarette*

Howie: I really should have thought this through a little better. Nick, blindfolded, with a stick and candy. I'm goin home. Happy Birthday Nick! Hope that leg heals before tour Brian! AJ...happy puffing! Goodbye!!


Howie: *walks down the sidewalk shaking head* HOW did Kevin DO it?

AJ: Yeah and I'm going home because someone there actually ENJOYS my lightsaber!

Nick: PLEASE don't take that out again AJ! Just go!!

Brian: Wait ... what about my ambulance? Somebody? Hey the doctor on star trek was a hot lady... can you call her?

Nick: Never fear Spock ... I'll save you!! *picks up Brian*

Brian: *perks up* To the medical bay!!!!!!!

Nick: *runs*

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